Yesterday, my doctor encouraged me to prepare for chemo, and today another doctor agreed. We also learned that female patients who are treated with chemo are discouraged from having more children. Even though I expected everything the doctors said, I still felt shock, frustration, and disappointment.
The chemo treatment that the doctor advised was temozolomide. It is taken orally for five days and then a 23 day break before starting a new cycle. He advises to do three cycles before another MRI. After the MRI, we will discuss doing more rounds of treatment. We will probably follow this schedule for several rounds. My doctor said that everyone responds differently. Most people have bearable side effects, but some can’t handle them at all. Generally, younger patients experience a few days of extreme tiredness and discomfort, and then feel better.
This morning, I was considering how Moses’s life was also full of struggles, and in the end, Moses didn’t even get to enter the Promised Land. Sometimes I feel like Moses might have felt-always wanting the Promise Land but never leaving the desert.
This afternoon, I was reminded that Moses experienced God in the desert in ways that many in the Promised Land did not. Yes, I would prefer to be in the Promise Land rather than the desert, but I take comfort in the fact that God is in both.
Lord, show yourself to my family in ways we could not comprehend without these struggles. Keep us focused on you and not the pain of life.